It had been 7 days since Sihyun brought Hamin back from the Shadow World.
As discussed with the principal earlier, school classes were postponed for 7 days, and Hamin, who had been lying in the infirmary as if dead, had not awakened even after a week. Initially believing that Hamin would recover quickly since he was still breathing, Sihyun and the others were now silent in the infirmary, the prolonged waiting having sapped their spirits for any further odd confrontations among themselves.
The kids, either hugging their knees or leaning against the wall to soothe their anxiety, sighed deeply. Every time the nurse entered, she would be surprised and insist they rest elsewhere, but these were not children who would listen easily. Claiming they would feel more anxious if separated from Hamin, all 7 of them earnestly pleaded to stay by his side, leaving the nurse with no choice but to concede.
Thud, thud.
After watching the IV drip for a long while, Sihyun surveyed the expressions of the other kids. Seowoo, who had been engaging in a strange confrontation with Haru up until 7 days ago, now looked at Hamin's bed with worried eyes, and Haru, restless as if recalling his own collapse, kept checking on Hamin's complexion.
It seemed they were all worried after all.
Had it been like this when I collapsed?
Now experiencing concern for others from the bedside, the air felt different. Sihyun became acutely responsive to Hamin's faint breathing, hypersensitive to minor disturbances, and filled with regret for not acting faster. If this was how he felt now, he could hardly imagine how the others had felt all this time.
Especially since they had somewhat adjusted to this situation because of him.
This heavy silence and stark atmosphere didn't seem like something 17-year-olds should endure.
"...What if he's dead?"
Haewoon suddenly broke the silence. The startled kids panicked, covering Haewoon's mouth and signaling him with their eyes.
"Shut up, Kang Haewoon."
"But what if? What if this is the last we see of Hamin?"
"......"
"...I don't get why these things only happen to us."
The usually cheerful person's negative remarks had an even greater impact. Haewoon's lament that they alone were subjected to such torment left Sihyun speechless. His words struck Sihyun like lightning. He couldn't shake off the feeling of guilt.
At least, it wouldn't have been like this at first.
If it was their first time dealing with such a situation, they wouldn't have been this negative, nor appeared to be so resigned. The silence that followed Haewoon's addition confirmed the heavy mood in the infirmary.
Everyone was exhausted.
"...We start classes again on Monday?"
"Only in the morning."
"...Then we can't keep watch like this."
Jihye looked regretfully at Hamin. As the infirmary fell silent once more, Sihyun approached Hamin. Sitting on a chair next to the bed, he silently gazed at the boy. His gaze fell from Hamin's unmoving eyelashes to the slightly rising and falling abdomen.
Light flickered over Sihyun's hand and descended onto Hamin.
He already knew that healers from the association, more skilled than himself, had come and gone, making it unnecessary for him to heal. Yet, he used heal anyway, then bit his lip. The pairing device beeped, detecting mana usage. As its sound filled the infirmary, the nurse entered and lightly reprimanded Sihyun.
"Please refrain from unnecessary skill use. The whole school is on edge, and detecting mana use from another student might cause panic."
"...Yes."
Sihyun acknowledged the gentle reprimand, continuing to gaze only at Hamin. His action of using heal for Hamin felt like a deceitful attempt to alleviate his own guilt. Feeling uneasy, he covered his mouth and closed his eyes. Conversations he had shared with Hamin in the Shadow World came to mind. Recalling Hamin's words, as if he were facing imminent death, Sihyun clenched his fists and slowly opened his eyes to stare at Hamin.
"...What did you want to do once we got out?"
It was a question he had long wanted to ask. As much as Hamin had asked him, several times over.
Finally breaking the silence, the other children looked at Sihyun curiously. Realizing then that others were present, Sihyun closed his mouth. The conversation was between him and Hamin, so naturally, they wouldn't know.
Emotions piled up layer upon layer. It felt as if adding just one more emotion would topple the tower of feelings within him. With the weekend approaching and classes resuming soon, he doubted his ability to focus.
That's when it happened.
"...Have you been curious about that this whole time?"
"......
"
"Then, you've been thinking about me all this time. Should I be glad or sorry about that?"
Suddenly, a long-missed voice pierced the silence of the infirmary. Startled, Sihyun's chair rocked and then fell backward. As a signal, the astonished children, who had been silent, gasped in unison.
"Lee Hamin?"
"...Why are you all so surprised? See a ghost?"
"Hamin!"
His gruff but familiar reply surprised them. The first to rush to Hamin was, predictably, Haewoon.
Choking with emotion, Haewoon sprinted to Hamin and hugged his neck. The patient coughed in surprise, and the nurse scolded Haewoon.
"Haewoon! Hamin is still a patient!"
"Why did you wake up so late! Do you know how worried I was!"
"No, but before that, can you get off... cough!"
"Haewoon!"
The infirmary, which had been devoid of all life moments ago, was suddenly filled with energy. The nurse, giving up on scolding them, backed out of the room as Geonu helped her detach Haewoon and Haru tightly held Hamin's hand. Startled, Hamin shivered and shook off Haru's hand, questioning why everyone was acting so weird. Then, the Class A kids swarmed him.
"Lee Hamin!"
From then on, the nurse could no longer control them. Admitting defeat, she left some advice and exited the infirmary. Since Hamin's body was almost fully recovered, there wasn't much to worry about except for excessive movements. The children, engulfed in the joy of reunion, surrounded Hamin, exchanging light scoldings and inquiring about his well-being. It was a festive atmosphere.
"Sihyun! Come join us!"
After stepping back to observe from a distance, Sihyun was beckoned by Jihye. Hesitating at first, Jihye stretched out her hand and firmly grabbed his arm. Caught off guard, Sihyun found himself being pulled into the group, surrounded by Haewoon, Haru, and Geonu, facing a horribly uncomfortable Hamin.
Their eyes met. Hamin's purple irises faintly curved towards Sihyun, presenting a familiar yet strange face. The reality of him speaking and waking before him felt surreal, prompting Sihyun to hold his breath. It wasn’t long before the overwhelming sensation confirmed this wasn’t a dream.
“...Hello.”
It was a low, entrancing greeting, slipped out almost without thought. Down, blinking at the unexpected salutation, laughed along with the others. Only Geonu and Haru seemed confused, failing to grasp the situation.
“Hello? As if we’re meeting for the first time?”
Down’s laughter filled the room as he playfully slapped Sihyun’s shoulder. It seemed he wanted to hit the patient, Hamin, but settled for Sihyun, the former patient, instead. Sihyun, realizing the oddity too late, blushed at his ears. Even he thought it was a bit much.
But considering what he and Hamin had been through, thinking back on it, it didn’t seem too exaggerated.
“Look at this, awkward much? What, haven't seen each other in 7 years?”
Hamin quipped, shivering with a sneer before turning that gaze on Sihyun, reminiscent of their time trapped in the Shadow World. It was as if he was speaking his last words, asking what Sihyun would do next.
“Is that all you have to say?”
“...I don’t know.”
“What?”
“My mind’s a mess.”
The words flowed as they came to mind, reflecting his scattered thoughts and lack of reality. Being honest, Hamin chided him for making a fuss. Unable to deny it, Sihyun remained silent.
The mood that had flared up suddenly settled down again. Down, alternating glances between Hamin and Sihyun, suddenly spoke up.
“I’m looking for Lee Hyeji, Yoo Seowoo, Baek Geonu, Ban Haru, and Kang Haewoon to go buy porridge with me and Lee Hamin.”
Everyone but Sihyun and Hamin was called out. At the unexpected proposal, the kids looked puzzled, but Down decisively pulled the named individuals toward the door. As Sihyun and Hamin watched him bemused, Haewoon resisted loudly, calling out for Hamin.
“Why?! I want to stay with Hamin! Hamin! Hamin!”
Anyone would think they wouldn’t see each other for a year at this rate. Down, annoyed, forcibly dragged him along.
“Can’t you follow quietly? They need to vent to each other too.”
“Ah…”
Realization dawned on Sihyun and the others at Down’s words. They hadn’t expected such consideration from him. Eventually persuaded, the children left the infirmary, leaving Sihyun feeling awkward in the now-empty space with Hamin.
“...You’re awake.”
The first words he managed to utter were pitiful. Hamin, noticing, let out a light chuckle.
“Thought I wouldn’t wake up?”
“No, just…”
“You came to save me because you said you would.
“...Yeah.”
“And since you really came to save me, waking up was my part to do.”
Stretching languidly as if soothing his stiff body, his tone was nonchalant. It was hard to believe this boy had been on the brink of death, and Sihyun swallowed a strange frustration. Understanding Sihyun’s darkened expression, Hamin clicked his tongue, asking how it felt to be on the other side.
Sihyun admitted it was the worst. Then, a quiet, low laughter filled the room a couple of times.
“You’ve survived well.”
“And you managed to get out well.”
“Yeah.”
Their conversation paused there. Amid the silent tranquility, Sihyun felt a delayed fatigue creeping in, the exhaustion from keeping vigil and caring for Hamin finally catching up.
“...If you had died, it would have been hard.”
Trying to shake off sleepiness but failing, Sihyun broke the silence with that thought, eliciting laughter from Hamin. His laughter now seemed like a lullaby.
“Being left behind there after sending you away. Resisting, enduring, and eventually being swallowed by the shadows, I kept regretting.”
At those words, Sihyun’s mind sharpened.
“Regretting saving me?”
“No.”
“Then what?”
“Not saying something.”
Sihyun’s head, which had been drooping, slowly lifted to face Hamin. The purple eyes, filled with an unfamiliar seriousness, met his gaze
. They seemed to envelop Sihyun deeply, profoundly.
What hadn’t he said?
Did he also harbor a secret like Sihyun’s?
Countless thoughts swirled through Sihyun’s mind. As he was getting lost in his theories and questions, Hamin, who seemed to find Sihyun’s deep contemplation amusing, spoke up.
“I thought I should have said it at least once.”
His tone was tinged with laughter. Sihyun, looking at him as if to demand what he meant, prompted Hamin to add more after a pause.
“I like you.”
“......”
“That I should have said it.”
Sihyun’s eyes widened in shock. The sleepiness vanished instantly.
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