"Partnership, huh."
After forming a partnership with Haru, Sihyun, who had never spoken to Hamin about any topic, wrinkled his nose in response to hearing such an unexpected conversation in this manner.
"What do you mean?"
"Just as it sounds. Partner with me. Haru, let's be partners."
"Hamin."
"Why, don't you like it?"
"What's with your attitude?"
His tone was sharp enough to be felt even by himself, making Sihyun uncomfortable. It wasn't just discomfort; it felt like someone had mixed mud into his clear water.
Unpleasantries aside, Hamin's way of speaking didn't sit well with Sihyun, so he pinched the skin on the inside of his cheek. Speaking without considering the other person's feelings, throwing words carelessly, and on top of that, imposing the condition of being partners.
"Has nothing changed since the first time we met?"
"What?"
"It seems like I'm the only one who wanted to resolve things properly with you. You don't care at all."
Just acting sulky like a child.
Sihyun bit his lip out of frustration after expressing his inner thoughts. Hamin's pupils reflected surprise, and it irritated Sihyun. It was too clear that Hamin spoke without considering his feelings. It wasn't something that could be brushed aside easily. It felt unsettling, like someone had tainted his clear water with mud.
Having not intended for this, Sihyun realized the nature of his emotions only after contemplating the time he spent with Hamin. They were relatively comfortable together, often playing jokes and chatting without much concern. Without realizing it, he had developed a certain affection for Hamin.
"I thought of you as a friend."
"...."
"But it seems like you don't think the same."
Deciding not to give in to his feelings, there was a time when Sihyun treated Hamin coldly. However, he ended up developing feelings, and now, the result felt like stepping on a landmine. Sihyun, with a sinking voice, stepped back from Hamin. Continuing the conversation seemed like it would only worsen his mood, leading to more conflict than reconciliation.
"I'm leaving."
Even though it was a farewell, as Sihyun turned around after saying goodbye, Hamin's hand grabbed him before he could take a step. It was irritating, so Sihyun pulled his wrist out, intending to move his irritated foot.
"Sorry."
With a low voice, Hamin held onto Sihyun, who was about to leave after the apology. It sounded like he was leaving again, and Sihyun's fingertips trembled. Unexpectedly, the sound echoed again, and Sihyun's fingertips twitched. Without thinking, Sihyun looked at the hand holding him, and it felt slightly stiff. Apologizing for the second time was something unexpected.
"What did you say?"
"I'm sorry."
With a nonchalant tone, Hamin spoke and reached out to grab Sihyun again. Although he seemed to have loosened his grip, it was slightly tense.
"Sorry."
The low voice seemed to soothe Sihyun as he turned him around. The purple eyes lost their dominance and quietly stared at the blue eyes.
"Why are you apologizing?"
"Because you seem uncomfortable."
This wasn't what Sihyun wanted. A sincere apology followed the words. It wasn't false, and Sihyun could tell from the tone and gaze. Sihyun sighed quietly.
"Then what did you intend?"
"To form a partnership. I wanted to break the awkwardness between us. But if I just say, 'Let's be partners,' would you do it? You seemed curious about me, so instead of answering your questions, I asked you to be my partner..."
It wasn't his intention to go this far. Apologies were added to the following words. It wasn't a lie, and it was evident from the tone and gaze. Sihyun let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding.
"People, don't grab them like they're nothing."
"Huh?"
"Don't endlessly talk about forming a partnership."
"Huh."
"But this time, at least you didn't say you'd do what you did before."
Thinking it was the same as before, he realized that it had changed somewhat positively after calming down and reflecting on it. But that didn't mean it was a good thing. It was an action suitable for those who didn't know how to reconcile or have conversations properly, especially in a situation where they fought and made up.
"Well, I'm leaving."
Despite this last consideration, Sihyun turned his body after greeting and before he could take a step, Hamin's hand grabbed him. Feeling irritated, Sihyun pulled out his wrist, and Hamin looked surprised for a moment. Then, he made an absurd expression again. Watching Hamin's vivid facial expressions, Sihyun walked past him like a ghost from the past.
"Stay close. Do you think it's common sense to fall from this height?"
"...You seem to have deviated from that common sense."
What am I?
As Sihyun, who was about to retort, recalled the past incidents like a lantern passing by, he quietly closed his mouth. Then, diverting the topic, he continued the conversation.
"If it were someone else, they wouldn't be able to put up with all your quirks."
"What am I."
"After apologizing to me, saying something like that?"
When the sincere apology was uttered, a bewildered expression played across Haemin's face. Despite the awkwardness, he chose not to object.
Silently, Sihyun gazed at the scenery, listening to the soothing sound of the waves. It had a certain charm to it when observed like this.
After a few minutes had passed, it felt like quite a while of absorbing the sea breeze. During this time of tranquility, Sihyun recalled the conversation with Haemin before the summer vacation and, unexpectedly, a chuckle escaped him. Emitting a soft sound, the wind seemed to carry away his laughter. Haemin, wearing a puzzled expression, narrowed his eyes. The way he looked at Sihyun changed, questioning the reason for his laughter.
"What's so funny?"
"Well, I can laugh sometimes."
"When were you ever good at laughing?"
"That's... "
Though he wasn't known for being particularly cheerful, Sihyun thought he had been laughing more than usual lately. So, he took a deep breath, ignoring Haemin's question about the reason for his laughter.
It was amusing.
The person who should have apologized was him, yet in the end, Haemin was the one who apologized. Back then, it was his clumsiness that had caused the situation to escalate, but today, it seemed like Haemin was clumsily seeking forgiveness. Whether one was seventeen or twenty-three, they were equally awkward, and that realization made Sihyun laugh.
The sea breeze whispered through the air as Sihyun continued to laugh a few more times, while Haemin wore an incredulous expression. The laughter felt liberating, and Sihyun couldn't help but find satisfaction in this simple reconciliation. It was ironic that such a simple resolution had eluded them until now, with more than half the blame lying with Haemin.
"You're not even a kid, yet you keep pretending as if nothing happened, causing things to escalate."
"Why are you getting mad again?"
"I said it was okay to apologize, and I went out of my way to avoid you. Experiencing that makes me feel subtly uncomfortable. Do you want me to go around avoiding you?"
"It doesn't matter."
"See, it makes you feel bad."
"Do you listen to what you want to hear?"
"Yeah."
Responding without hesitation, Haemin's tone was low when he said it didn't matter. Sihyun, who had asked the question, adjusted his hair that had been swaying uncomfortably. The atmosphere, neither uncomfortable nor unpleasant, felt strangely satisfying. Sihyun realized that what he wanted had come true and looked at Haemin, wondering if the reconciliation was over. He wanted to ask what Haemin wanted to say and thought it would be better to ask directly than to keep pondering.
"Do you have anything else to say to me?"
"You apologized just now."
"I'm asking if there's anything else you wanted to say. You didn't talk about something earlier when mentioning your brother."
"Oh..."
That was enough now.
Haemin stammered. Back then, when he had called out to his brother as if in a nightmare, Sihyun wasn't curious. He didn't want to dig into the story, didn't want to get involved deeply. But now, things were different. He had become somewhat close to Haemin, and in fact, Haemin had been quite approachable. He was the most amiable among them. Instead of keeping an eye on things, it might be better to ask straightforwardly and get a clear answer.
"The reason for suggesting to become partners is because of your brother, right?"
"...."
"What kind of relationship do you have with your brother? What happened?"
"Why, curious?"
"Then if I'm not curious, why would I ask?"
Without addressing the trivial remark and as if telling him to answer instead of avoiding it, Sihyun covered Haemin's phone with his hand. They had crossed a line. If not today, they might never cross it again. So, Sihyun, wanting answers in some way, stared at Haemin.
"I want to know why you want to become partners. I want to understand the reason. Tell me."
A small yet powerful voice reached Haemin. Haemin quietly gazed at Sihyun, meeting his eyes with those quiet, blue pupils.
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