"You!"
Kang Sihyun immediately rushed to the boy, grabbing his arm. Startled, the boy exclaimed, "What? Why are you doing this?" Shocked by the question, Sihyun furrowed his brows.
"What's going on? Why have you only appeared now?"
Although Sihyun had long awaited this reunion, Kang Sihyun had disappeared before the dungeon appeared and hadn't shown up for a long time. Because of this, Sihyun had thought that Kang Sihyun's soul had been completely absorbed by him, like when Adam first reincarnated. He believed the traces of soul separation had disappeared and that his and Eve's souls had merged again, but there he was, alive.
Feeling betrayed, he asked sharply, and the boy, with his grabbed arm hurting, pretended to be in pain.
"It doesn't even hurt."
What nonsense about pain when you're a soul.
When Sihyun hit the nail on the head, the boy burst into laughter, his clear laughter and refreshing voice unchanged even after so long. Sighing, Sihyun sat down next to him.
"What's going on? Why are you here now?"
"It's time we merged back."
At that moment, Sihyun's heart sank. The boy, seeing his shocked face, tapped Sihyun's shoulder casually.
"Hey, why are you so surprised? If it were originally, I'd be you and you'd be me, right?"
Or am I just you?
The boy rubbed his neck, unsure.
"I've hardly lived a life fully as myself…"
Realizing this, Sihyun felt a pang of regret. The newly created soul of Eve had merged with him at birth, and they had lived Adam's life together. It was only now that the souls had separated and they lived separate lives. This body would have held special memories for Kang Sihyun more than anything else.
It wasn't something that could just be merged at will.
Realizing this made his heart heavier. As Sihyun's expression darkened with thought, Kang Sihyun tilted his head and then lay down, continuing the conversation.
"Before, I only knew that we lived separate lives, but being inside you, I learned about myself as much as you did."
Who I am, who you are, why we ended up this way.
The boy, having thought a lot and organized his thoughts in this space, spoke calmly. Sihyun, having nothing to say, shut his mouth.
In the past, he had felt guilty, thinking he had stolen the boy's body, but now he knew it wasn't like that. Still, he felt uncomfortable, having first enjoyed the body that should have been Eve's. The boy seemed to understand Sihyun's feelings and chuckled.
"We were originally one body, so why feel sorry?"
"We were one, but now we're separated."
It was enough reason to feel sorry, as each had lived their own life separately. The unspoken reason surfaced, but Kang Sihyun seemed to sense his inner thoughts.
"It wasn't stolen, Adam."
Hearing that name from Kang Sihyun's mouth gave Sihyun a strange feeling. The boy closed his eyes and continued.
"We're just returning to our original form. It's not so bad. I'll merge back with you and live as Kang Sihyun again."
"But your ego will disappear."
"It was always the same as yours. It just separated due to a special event."
His firm statement left no room for rebuttal. If given enough time, Sihyun felt he might have argued back, but the boy seemed not to want to wait. As the boy lay on the ground and turned his head toward Sihyun, then rolled over completely, Sihyun noticed for the first time how clear his own eyes were in the mirror.
Kang Sihyun's eyes held a pure, untainted light, unlike his own blue eyes.
"I didn't know that. So that's why you bothered me."
"What are you talking about?"
"Do you know how you ended up in this body?"
How did I end up here? That must be because fate collided, and the soul split, and when the body died, the soul had to find a new place to return. As he thought this, Kang Sihyun shook his head.
"Back then, neither of us knew anything. For another soul to enter a body already possessed by a soul, the existing soul must give way. Haven't you heard this before?"
"...Ah."
Acknowledging this new information, Kang Sihyun smiled with his eyes. Sihyun instinctively realized what he was talking about.
"...A bet?"
When he first met him in this space, he had been gambling with God. Remembering this, he asked, and the boy grinned mischievously. Unlike himself, Kang Sihyun's dimples showed when he smiled.
"Right. I've seen you in this body. Specifically, I saw
'Yoo Sihyun' you."
"...From middle school? I dreamed every day, and it was your dream. In my dream, you always appeared, and young you always cried and..."
"...Stop talking."
Memories from when he was Yoo Sihyun weren't good ones. They had been traumatic enough at one point. Now, as these nearly forgotten past events began to resurface, Sihyun stopped the boy, and Kang Sihyun closed his mouth, watching him. Their eyes met, and Sihyun saw his own expression reflected in the boy's eyes.
It looked like he might cry.
"That's the same expression you had back then. Every day, I felt so sorry for the crying you and wanted to help. One day, you in my dreams grew up, and then you didn't cry anymore, just endured."
With a face that carried all misfortunes.
The boy continued speaking plainly, skipping over the parts that might have been traumatic for Sihyun and continuing the conversation. Sihyun didn't stop him or say anything further, just listened quietly.
If this was their last conversation before Kang Sihyun disappeared, he had the duty to listen to everything.
"So, I hoped you would be happy. It started around the third year of middle school. Every day, I hoped you would be happy, and then one day someone asked me. 'Do you really wish it were so?'"
"Ah."
Sihyun sighed, knowing who had asked that question. He almost spoke out loud before Kang Sihyun nodded.
"Right. It was God. Specifically, our …well, I don't like to say it, but our father."
Not really willing, the boy continued with a sour face.
"So, I naively answered yes. Then 'He' suddenly laughed at me. You were born to be unhappy, he said. You will never be happy. I was shocked by his words and pressed him hard, not knowing about fate or Adam then."
"Hmm…"
You've made an extreme decision.
Sihyun guessed how God must have felt when he said those words, what expression he might have worn under his robe. Just nodding his head as if in pain, Kang Sihyun spoke enthusiastically, as if his story was an epic tale.
"At the end of the argument, I said you could be happy no matter what, and then He suggested a bet. You had just died. He said, 'Let's bet whether you can be happy in this body or not.'"
"So, you accepted that bet?"
As Sihyun asked incredulously, the boy looked embarrassed.
"Yeah. I was really enchanted then. I thought even if you took over my body, I hoped you would be happy. I didn't know why I was so earnest then, but now I understand."
The boy spoke plainly, sitting up and looking straight at Sihyun. Facing his unwavering blue gaze, Sihyun found compassion and guilt in the boy's eyes, emotions he had once seen in his own expression.
"...Because I was fully enjoying the happiness that you should have had, that's why it bothered me."
Maybe something inside me recognized you.
Speaking abstractly, the boy took Sihyun's hand. Having heard how Kang Sihyun had ended up betting with God and how he could return to this body, Sihyun felt a heavy feeling in his gut. Kang Sihyun did not offer common words of comfort like 'Are you okay?' or 'It must have been hard,' but Sihyun felt he was being comforted.
And also felt terribly sorry.
Why are you sorry.
We're just, we're just caught in a mistake.
Thinking this, Sihyun tried to comfort the boy when Kang Sihyun's hand covered his mouth. Sihyun blinked in surprise.
"You don't need to hear it."
"...If you say that, I'll really go crazy with guilt."
The boy showed a twisted, crumbling smile for the first time. With a face so truthful, Sihyun held his tongue after a moment of contemplation and then pulled down the boy's hand and hugged him close.
"Listen anyway. It's not your fault."
"...Neither your fault nor mine. So don't feel guilty unnecessarily, and don't pity me, just..."
Speaking with each syllable clear and repressed emotion, Kang Sihyun looked as if he might cry any moment. At that moment, Sihyun was holding the boy's hand, which began to blur.
Is this like waking from a dream?
No, it's different.
This was Kang Sihyun's soul disappearing, precisely, blending with him.
Shocked, he just stared at that hand, and the boy, also looking down, let out a small sigh.
"Looks like it's time."
"...Is this the end?"
It was unbelievable. Given too little time, Sihyun tried desperately to hold onto the boy's hand. There was so much he still wanted to
say. He had to comfort him, tell him about Daun's story, about his parents, how he had been here, how the bet turned out, and everything. Amid these thoughts, as he frantically tried to grasp the boy, a clear laughter burst forth.
"It doesn't have to be. This is a natural process. I'm satisfied that I lived my life, even if it was short, and I'm satisfied that I can merge with you with a clear heart. I've seen everything about Daun and your parents in you, so don't worry. And about the bet..."
Unlike the flustered Sihyun, the boy continued calmly, meeting Sihyun's eyes and smiling as he asked.
"Yoo Sihyun. Are you happy now?"
"..."
Suddenly hit by that question, Sihyun's eyes widened. He couldn't answer. Not because he wasn't happy, but because answering might make the boy disappear completely. But the boy, seemingly reading people's hearts on his own, murmured thankfully. Damn it. Sihyun, not yet ready to let him disappear, grabbed his collar and pulled him close.
"You know I still have one thing left to do. So I'll answer you after it's all over. So somehow hang in there."
Deal with Gula, and then we'll talk again. He spoke as if urging, and the boy smiled with a somewhat empty expression.
"You're asking too much."
As the boy's hand began to blur, his legs and arms also started to fade. Soon his face would blur too, so Sihyun called out his name.
"It's a promise, Kang Sihyun."
Knowing the promise might not be kept, aware of his own stubbornness, he muttered as if entranced, and the boy chuckled lightly and replied.
"See you next time."
With those words, the boy's body completely blurred. Watching him disappear from sight, Sihyun turned his head toward someone he had felt in the corner of the space.
"...Were you watching all this?"
As his hollow voice reached out, the figure wearing a robe took off his hat and approached Sihyun.
It was God.
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